Bill Simmons destroys Rasheed Wallace | Red's Army - The Voice of Boston Celtics Fans
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Bill Simmons destroys Rasheed Wallace

ESPN's Bill Simmons has one helluva column on the Celtics and Rasheed Wallace:

Wallace is only a 35-year-old bench player on a pseudo-contender that
will lose in Round 1 or 2 of the playoffs. But it's been a decidedly
unhappy regular season for a 50-win team. Forget about Kevin Garnett's
balky knee or Paul Pierce's aching body — there were damaging trade
rumors, young guns (Kendrick Perkins and Rajon Rondo) rebelling against
the old guard, legitimate alpha dog and chemistry issues, a coach who
can't consistently motivate his team or settle on a rotation, ongoing
rebounding woes and, worst of all, old legs. Only Rondo's individual
brilliance made things tolerable. Everything else felt like the
basketball version of that movie in which Leo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet
scream at each other for two hours.

I can't disagree with anything in that paragraph. Or the two below.

Sheed likes jogging at half-speed. He submits entire sequences — two or
three minutes at a time, six or seven trips up and down the court —
without ever passing either foul line. Sometimes I count to see how many
consecutive possessions Sheed can pull off without crossing either
charity stripe. His unofficial record is nine.

Sheed doesn't rebound as much as debound. "Lazy" isn't a strong enough
word. He always seems to be standing in the wrong spot. He constantly
forgets to box out. His hops are long gone, so balls routinely bounce
over his head to opposing players. When matched against a hustler like
Anderson Varejao, it's like watching a golden retriever fight off a
Rottweiler. Advanced metrics prove that he's a catastrophic offensive
rebounder and someone who subtly altered the identity of this season's
Celtics team. (See sidebar.) So there's that.

The column is a hilarious and, unfortunately for us fans craving another title, all true.

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  • Hit the nail on the head with this one. No way Rasheed does not see this.

  • *sigh*

  • AP

    My hope is that Danny realizes this and somehow gets rid of him this summer…

  • ryan

    i read the entire article…great article we got going on here. couldnt have had written it better myself. i was a sheed fan in the past thought he would be a decent backup helping out…cant say i am anymore!

  • Donald

    Simmons is such a hack he lost credibility a long time ago. Let’s just be honest people don’t like Sheed because he’s an easy target. In his entire career he’s only had a problem with one teammate and that was Sabonis. Every team he’s been on they all loved him. The problem is we don’t see him behind closed doors. In practice, meetings, etc. All we have to go on is his on court performance. You all want someone to blame so it must be Sheed. I don’t recall anyone complaining about him when we were 25-5 or what ever it was. When the injuries started he was asked to play to many minutes and that’s when his play declined. He’s been in league for 15 years. He’s 36 years old and people want him to play like he’s 20. I’ve been trying to figure out what people hate most about Sheed. He’s averaging 11 less minutes a game so obviously his number will be down. He’s only off his career average for 3’s by .05%. For his career he averages 6 rebounds a game. This year he is averaging 4 so Simmons has no leg to stand on. So for once I would like an honest answer as to why people don’t like him.

  • AP

    I love Sheed. I just think he’s inconsistent and has no more drive as a player. In short, he’s a bad fit for the team.

  • Donald

    Well then we might as well get rid of Rondo, Pierce, Davis, Daniels (which I actually would second) and Lucky because they have all been just as inconsistent.

  • irisheyes9302

    When did Sheed get a one game suspension? I thought he was still at 14? I think this is way too harsh, but I suppose he’s earned that. Every game I find myself thinking, “THIS is the guy everyone flew to Detroit to convince to come here? Really?”
    Simmons is right about one thing, though. Had Sheed ever made up his mind to be a dominant player, he would have been terrifying. He had the ability and the talent, just never the drive.

  • Joseph

    But I thought Rasheed and that title were ….
    GUARN-SHEED. hahahahhahaa
    LOL. The guy has been done. He should’ve stayed retired. He had an impact in Detroit, but that’s it (and don’t even bring up Portland – there’s a reason they got rid of him).

  • AP

    I am sure Sheed’s wonderful in the huddle. He seems like a cool dude (from what we know) and I’d be first to defend him for that. Nobody is arguing that. What (I think) is more important is his on court performance.
    I agree, his stats will go down with his minutes, but since last season(in Detroit) his effort has been subpar. His game-time intensity is most times lacking (how do you quantify this?).
    The 3 point shooting is great, it’s just almost never timely (Career 3’s stats = 31.2; 2010 3’s = 28.2). His talents are better suited for the paint and for some reason he keeps away from it (everybody has an opinion on the why – I can’t say I know the reason).
    I just think another 7 footer could do a better job in there, where hustle is much needed. Something to handle for next year, in my humble opinion.

  • Donald

    My guess would be that his game-time intensity (or lack there of) is just an extension of who he is as a person. Just very laid back. Not everyone will be KG. Kinda reminds me of Bird and McHale. Bird always the intense one and McHale just going out to play some ball. Not saying McHale didn’t bust ass on every play but he is the one that said “don’t score 50 a night because then everyone will expect it”. I will say that since the return of KG he has been good (not great) at playing on the block. I also see your point I just can’t think of a 7 footer that is available that plays that way. I just get aggravated when people like Simmons who sit on their pedestal and hide behind a typewriter and just sling mud.

  • KY Celts fan

    Its not about his personality. Simmons said so a thousand times. He’s a fun guy who everyone loves. It’s the on the court stuff (or basically everything Simmons wrote about). He’s just damn lazy. He doesn’t care. And yes, everyone was complaining about him when we were 25-5 because he was bricking 3’s like there was no tomorrow!
    Personally, I think your personal issues here towards Simmons has really clouded your judgement. I’m not a big fan of Simmons either. He’s an entertaining writer, but also a Chicken Little. But he’s dead on with Sheed here. Accept that.

  • Dan from Providence

    I agree with everything Simmons just said. I was just as excited about getting Rasheed as the next Celtics fan, but he has been a huge disappointment. I think they should give Sheldon more minutes. At least he will hustle and play like a big man. Rasheed hurts Big Baby’s numbers because Big Baby isn’t able to shoot his 10-footers anymore. He has to bang down low when he is in because Rasheed is standing 20 feet away from the basket ready to get the ball and shoot.

  • mikey

    Stupid stupid stupid article. Very stupid.
    Sheed is the best. So happy he is here and he deserves antother title which he will get this year with the C’s.
    People blaming their life’s problems on Rasheed. Its just plain stupid. What are we going to blame Sheed now for the federal deficit?, the war in the Mid East?, Unemployment?
    C’mon. Sheed is here for a reason. Playoffs and to expose stupid journalists, and cheating crappy refs.
    THE NEED FOR SHEED!!!!!!!!!!